As Steve opened the opaque kitchen window I was struck by the view of the sun dancing on the sea. Terracotta buildings rose out of the canopy of palm trees, swaying in the sea breeze. How on earth did we come to be in this paradise? I admit I have no clue. Almost as if the sequentiality of time has disappeared momentarily and there is nothing but this moment. The mind cannot find cause or process or a journey of how we came to be here.
Yet here we are.
And how did I come to be in such a good mood? There is a peace here, a tranquility. Somehow my experience seems boundless, as the waves break somewhere in the distance.
But last night was a totally different story. Physical tension has been building every day and my muscles are tired, I’ve had frequent headaches and have sometimes felt sick. Last night my nerves in my gums were aching. Yet today I am in a good mood, and my body also seems in a better mood. My mind cannot find cause or process or a journey of how I came to be in this good mood.
Yet here I am.
Isn’t it funny how nothing material can change and yet our experience can completely change without us needing to lift a single finger? We don’t need to do anything for our mood to improve.
[click_to_tweet tweet=”Isn’t it funny how nothing material can change and yet our experience can completely change without us needing to lift a single finger? We don’t need to do anything for our mood to improve.” quote=”Isn’t it funny how nothing material can change and yet our experience can completely change without us needing to lift a single finger? We don’t need to do anything for our mood to improve.”]I remember days when we would go to the seaside with the deliberate intention to get away from it all in order to lose ourselves in the bleach of the sun and saltwater, only to find my mind just couldn’t relax. A whole day in idyllic circumstances. Wasted. And then the long drive home…
Changing my environment didn’t always change my mood; it was not a reliable method. But I kept using it because once it had worked. Actually, once it *appeared* to have worked. But maybe I am forgetting other factors. Maybe, most simply put, my bad mood was already on its way out.
They say that intermittent reinforcement is the most powerful motivator. When we believe that sometimes, changing our environment causes our mood to change, we cling on to that ‘technique’, no matter how much it fails, because maybe, just maybe, next time it will work.
But your mood doesn’t depend on your environment; it only depends on your perception of your environment. When your perception changes, your mood automatically changes. Nothing material needs to change for that to happen. When you see things differently, you feel differently.
[click_to_tweet tweet=”When you see things differently, you feel differently. ” quote=”When you see things differently, you feel differently.”]You could even say, when you see things better, you feel better.
And whilst, like me, it’s tempting to think we can – and should – do something to see things better, the reality is you don’t need to. Your mood is always ever changing, like clouds passing through the sky. Here today, gone tomorrow, no effort required.
And really that’s the best advice for people prone to struggling (like me): Keep your fingers out of the machine! Let your mind do it’s thing. When you’re in a bad mood it’s okay. It’s just what happens sometimes. A dark cloud, some rain, perhaps some thunder.
Remember; it won’t last forever.